The Astounding Phenomenon of Receiving What You Give Out
There is a simple, yet extremely powerful phenomenon that we all experience in our daily lives, whether we are conscious of it or not; we receive what we give out. This applies to our relationship with Allah, as Allah has clearly told us and is discussed here, but also our relationships with the people in our lives, and even those we encounter for just minutes. It has a powerful impact on how people treat you, in a very interesting way.
Can you think of a person who seems to always get into altercations when they are going about their daily lives? It could be road rage, arguments at the supermarket or with strangers anywhere. Now think about your experience of that person's thought processes and mannerisms. Do they usually wear a smile? Are they quick to think negatively or take things personally? Perhaps they are defensive and expecting people to pick a fight with them?
The way you have answered the questions above will tell you a lot about the kind of feelings that brew inside that person day to day. Without even realising it, and without necessarily expressing it, they emanate this negative 'energy,' which causes others to pick up on it, also without realising, and respond to them in a negative way. So it's a vicious cycle that even acts as an affirmation of the negative thoughts they started off with.
The great news is, and what we would like for you to take away from this piece to powerfully enrich your interactions, is that this also works the other way around! So if you are emanating a wonderful positive 'energy,' because of your internal thoughts, people pick up on that and the results are beautiful!
You can imagine how this can improve your relationships with your boss, colleagues, friends and most importantly, your family; siblings, spouse, children and in-laws. BUT It only works if you are sincere in it. In other words, you cannot fake this positive flow. It takes work to get there and it takes a connection with Allah. Please don't be mistaken into thinking that you can only get there if all is fine and dandy in your life. This is a place you can be in no matter what is going on. Refer to the Young Muslim's Mindful Book of Wellbeing for steps to help you insha'Allah.
What this phenomenon highlights is (and you've heard this before) that life is a mirror. You receive what you give out. So if you feel that you need more love, give out more love to those around you. If you feel that you need more support, consider and act on how you can be more supportive to those around you. If you feel that you are not understood, try to understand and empathise with those around you.
Our connection with Allah (saw) is also boosted by our own thoughts, perceptions and expectations. In the hadith qudsi HE tells us:
I am as My servant thinks I am. I am with him when he makes mention of Me. If he makes mention of Me to himself, I make mention of him to Myself; and if he makes mention of Me in an assembly, I make mention of him in an assembly better than it. And if he draws near to Me an arm's length, I draw near to him a cubit, and if he draws near to Me a cubit, I draw near to him a fathom. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.
Narrated by Abu Hurayrah (ra) - Bukhari and Muslim
This is our creator, most high, who acts with us according to what we expect of Him. And He not only gives the amount we give, but multiplies our own reaching out to him in unimaginable ways. Subhan'Allah. Of course, we can't expect humans to respond to us in any way close to our Lord, but they will surprise you, and warm your heart when they receive your warmth insha'Allah. It's beautiful how Allah trains us to think positively and have good expectations.
The Young Muslim's Mindful Book of Wellbeing conveys this; and other wholly important wellbeing concepts and those that create a deep connection with Allah; to children (and adults!) in an easy to understand, child-friendly way. Learn more about the book here.